The Natural Pick-Me-Up

At the end of the day today, I was feeling pretty blah.  I didn't have a bad day, things weren't going to hell in a hand basket. But I just couldn't shake the purples.  (I wouldn't qualify them as the blues, but there was definitely some off-black to them.)

I let the feelings sit in the back seat of the truck as I drove to get Adam to take him to scouts. Adam, (not his real name), is one of the best 10 year old guys on the planet. He just got his report card, all A's, and is not shy about telling me that he loves me. (So what that it's only at home. He really means it.  Ha!)  He's a great gamer and is very creative when he lets himself try. He loves to read and can express himself pretty damn well in writing. He's even trying to get out of the natural track of school and go to a special, advanced science and math academy next year because it will challenge him. I doubt any dad could love his son more that I love him.

So I pick him up from his mom's house and we drive off to scouts. He starts telling me about his day, the work that he is doing, and his how his favorite teacher from last year is spending fun time with him after school. As I listen, I had flashes of the young boy he used to be. He has really done well for himself, living in a world where his mom and dad have been married and divorced twice to each other. He is adjusting to having a guy date his mom and propose to her over Christmas break.  I work hard to provide a healthy environment, despite the upheaval I also helped supply, and he doesn't seem to hold anything against us.

By the time we get to scouts, I realize all is pretty good again and we are laughing on our way inside. For those dads who let the negativity of a spouse's infidelity or dishonesty color everything about them during divorce, keep in mind that our kids are sponges and the soak in the good and the bad. Lead them down the high road as much as you can so that they build strenth in their own personality and self-confidence. Honesty is huge, but avoiding the nasty honest truth is the wise thing, as our kids don't need to be exposed to the crap that settled between husband and ex-spouse. The kids may learn someday down the road, but it serves no good purpose while they are still growing up in our house. Yes, a dad will sometimes take a hit from the painful actions of the spouse, but firing back with the kids in the warzone does NOBODY any good.

My Adam and Eve are my living proof that I did the right thing. They are both such bright spots in my life and I'm more grateful every day. Around them, it is pretty difficult for the periods of blah to get through.